Thursday, June 09, 2005

Can You Believe It?

Can you believe how long it's been since I've been on here? I haven't really been up to anything all that great, so I don't know why I haven't been on here!

Although, I have been going to a lot of baseball games since we got the season tickets! The best part about it is...the Cardinals are doing awesome so far this year! We're number 1 in the division and we're like 7 or so games ahead of the Cubs (number 2). Go Cards! Our next game is this Saturday against the Yankees...but I'm not going - I'm going to scrapbook with L! I have so much scrapbooking to get done, it's not funny. I probably won't even get any done on Saturday because for some reason I'm not motivated enough to work and talk at the same time, apparently I'd just rather talk :O) I don't know if J will go to the game or not, he will probably have to work. We'll see what happens. I know that some lucky soul will end up with our tickets.

In other Cardinals news we took the Red Sox 2-1 in the series (the games were Monday night, Tuesday night and last night). Why couldn't we have done that in October????? I guess we just didn't have the team we have now, who knows? Maybe the Cards didn't WANT it bad enough, or they didn't want it as bad as the Red Sox did. I don't know...I'll shut up about baseball now.

I haven't been up to much else. Although, tonight I am going to my nephew's baseball game - he's six and they are soooo cute!

Speaking of cousin's wife just had their first baby boy! He was born June 1st - he's such a cutie pie! I know they must be proud...and tired!

What else????'s a couple of OLD jokes:

A mortician was working late one night. It was his job to examine the dead bodies before they were sent off to be buried or cremated. As he examined the body of Mr. Schwartz, who was about to be cremated, he made an amazing discovery. Schwartz had the longest private part he had ever seen! "I'm sorry, Mr. Schwartz", said the mortician, "but I can't send you off to be cremated with a tremendously huge private part like this. It has to be saved for posterity." With that, the coroner used his tools to remove the dead man's unit. He stuffed his prize into a briefcase and took it home. The first person he showed it to was his wife. "I have something to show you that you won't believe," he said, and opened up his briefcase. "Oh my God!" the wife screamed, "Schwartz is dead!"

A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door. "Hurry," she said, "stand in the corner." Then she quickly rubbed baby oil all over him and then dusted him with talcum powder. "Don't move until I tell you to," she whispered. "Just pretend you're a statue." "What's this, honey?" the husband inquired as he entered the room. "Oh, it's a statue," she replied nonchalantly. "The Smith's bought one for their bedroom. I liked it so much, I got one for us too." No more was said about the statue, not even later when they went to sleep. Around two in the morning, the husband got out of bed, went to the kitchen and returned a while later with a sandwich and a glass of milk. Here," he said to the statue, "eat something. I stood like an idiot at the Smith's for three days and nobody offered me so much as a glass of water."

A man walks into a night club one night. He goes up to the bar and asks for a beer. Certainly, Sir, that'll be 1 cent." "One Cent?", exclaimed the man. So the man glances over at the menu and asks, "Could I have a nice juicy T-bone steak, with chips, peas and a fried egg?" "Certainly Sir," replies the barman, "but that comes to real money." "How much money?" inquires the man. "4 cents," the bartender replied. "Four Cents?", exclaimed the man. "Where's the guy who owns this place?" The bartender replied, "Upstairs, with my wife." The man says, "What's he doing upstairs with your wife?" The bartender replied, "The same thing as I'm doing to his business!"

Alright, well, I guess that's all I have to say for now...but, in the words of Ahnold (Governa of Californeea), "I'll be back".