Friday, November 03, 2006

Letter I Wish I'd Sent

Bob, over at Letters I Wish I'd Sent, has done something that I think is hilarious and cathartic. He posts letters that he wishes he sent to the addressees - most of them are pretty much telling these people just how stupid and annoying they really are. I just thought of one I could send this morning.

Dear Lonna*,

I realize you take into account my allergic rhinitis to cigarette smoke when you come back from your smoke breaks. But, I don't know how to tell you that dousing yourself in White Diamonds perfume DOES NOT help the situation... it only makes it worse. Now, not only does my nose go into overactive drainage mode from the smell of cigarette smoke, my nose AND my eyes start running and then I sneeze until my nose is so stuffed up that I can't even get four words out without becoming severly winded - all because of that monstrously strong perfume.

I can't believe I'm about to say this, but can we just go back to having you smell like cigarette smoke? I may produce a little drainage, but with a box of tissues, it's a bit more manageable at that point.

Again, thank you for trying to think of me - I really do appreciate it.

Sincerely,

Mikala (aka Stuffy the Nose)

*names have been changed to protect the identity of the perpetrator

3 comments:

Jen said...

LOL!! I wish I could send this letter to a few of my coworkers.

Twisted Sister said...

Bwahahahaha, why don't ya go ahead and send it? LOL

You crack me up.

I'm sorry you have to deal with the puffer who bathes in white diamond perfume. *ick*

Mikala said...

And, ya know? It really only bothers me on days that my allergies are bothering me. But, seeing as how I live in St. Louis, that's every frickin' day!

Frick on a stick with a brick!